The Mad Hatter
by semioticXlove
Summary: SyFy's mini-series, Alice, from Hatter's point of view. Rated M just in case...
1. Chapter 1

"Not yet," he groaned as the sun hit his eyes. He lifted his head to glance at the clock, and jumped up. He pulled on a pair of slacks,boots, a button up shirt, and topped it off with a brown leather jacket. The man looked in the mirror. He saw a man of little integrity. One who kissed ass for the house of cards, but secretly helped the resistance. Secretly. Like he was ashamed. He was a man who seemed to have it all. But in truth, David Hatter was not a happy man.

He walked out of the little apartment he had in the back of his tea shop and opened the door to let his only employee inside. They shared the normal niceties, "Beautiful weather, yeah?" and "Cup of tea?" before Hatter sauntered back to his grass carpeted flat. He grabbed his bottle of happiness and sat in his white leather chair and sighed. After he made himself a cup, he studied the bottle. Plain, clear glass held the purple liquid. Emotion. The Queen had been kidnapping oysters for years and stealing their emotions. It was best if you drank a few drops with your tea. Happiness is the one Hatter craved. It kept him going every day. 'Human happiness. What a thrill,' he thought.

"Well, business must carry on," he said to noone. But, instead of doing his work, he stared out the window and shuddered. No matter how many times he saw the Scarab, it still gave him the chills. He saw it now, flying low. It had fifteen or twenty crates dangling from its underside. A new batch of oysters, so he should get a shipment soon. 'Good thing,' he thought, looking at his nearly depleted supply of happiness.

He put on his headphones, and relaxed a little, listening to the sound of Ed Kowalczyk's voice. "Love will lead us, alright. love will lead us, she will lead us..." he sang, and drummed the table. Then Hatter smelled something. It smelled like a wet, mangy dead rat. "Ratty," He said aloud, swiving his chair around and removing the headphones all at once. "What do you want?" He asked. He didn't like Ratty in his shop. It caused his cutomers to leave.  
"An oyster." Said Ratty. "Named Alice. I think she's..." He cut off. "Alice of Legend," he whispered.  
Hatter laughed. "Sure sure," he guffawed. "Alice of legend."  
"She wants help," replied Ratty.  
Hatter considered this. He could care less about helping her, but he could certainly cut a deal if her turned her over to the house of cards. "Bring her here," he said, and put his hat on. He swiveled his chair back around, and got back to drinking his tea. He heard (and smelt) them enter a few moments later.  
"Would you like a cup of tea?" He called, without turning around. 


	2. Chapter 2

"No thank you," the girl spoke. "Who are you?"  
Hatter spun around and saw the girl. But she wasn't a girl. She was a woman. A wet, beautiful woman. "A friend," he replied. "I hope. I run the tea shop". Ratty removed a dirty old bandana from Alice's arm. The mark of the Scarab. Why the hell would she stand in the light? It wasn't important now. "How did you break out of the Scarab?" As she told him, he had to keep himself from staring at this odd oyster. Fully clothed, modest almost, she was more beautiful than any woman he'd met in Wonderland.

"As you can see, I'm drenched," Alice finished. Yes. Hatter could defintely see that. He couldn't take his eyes away. "This place," said Alice. " What is it?  
"Oh. Wonderland." Hatter said, pointing his fingers outward.  
"That's a story in a kid's book," Alice scoffed.  
Hatter almost laughed. " Does this look like a kid's story to you?"  
"No"  
"It's changed alot since then."  
"So you're saying that it was real?"  
Hatter needed an excuse to touch her. Any excuse would do. He grabbed a magnifying glass from his desk, and approached her. "You oysters, excuse me," he grabs her arm and looks at the tattoo the Scarab left. She was warm. "don't know how to find us, so you tell yourselves that we don't exist, and quite fankly we'd like to keep it that way."  
"Why am I an oyster? Wh-- this?"  
"That's not gonna come off. Sorry!" he grinned like an idiot. "Only people from your world turn green when burned by the light. It's the Suit's way of branding their catch. And they call you oysters because of the shiny little pearls you all carry inside." Hatter walked away as he spoke. He didn't need to touch her again, though he wanted to badly.  
"What pearls?"  
"She's Alice," interjected Ratty. "Tell him who you are."  
"Well," said Hatter, and walked back to her. "Really? Ooohhh." He said,circling her and making an ass of himself. "Ratty here," he said, Hatter put his arm around him, and instantly regretted it. The stench was awful. "Thinks you're Alice," he paused. "Of legend."  
"Who?" replied Alice.  
"The last time a girl called Alice came here from your world," he started circling again. "She brought down the whole house of cards. Oh yeah. Made quite an impression." He was so close to touching her warm porclien colored skin again. "Although it was a hundred and fifty years ago." He turned to Ratty. "It can't be the same girl. Oysters don't even live that long."  
"I still want a good price," said the foul old man.  
"Wait a minute," said Alice. "I am not for sale."  
Hatter held one finger up to her, in order to silence her, and walked away to his shelf of teas. "Not on the grass," he yelled to Ratty.  
He grabbed his bottle of Contentment, but quickly changed his mind, and grabbed a smaller bottle that held a few drops of a pink liquid.  
"Here we are," he said, showcasing it. "Pink Nectar. Filled with the thrill of human excitement. Fifty oysters were drained of every last drop of hullabaloo so that you, Ratty, could taste what it feels like to win just once. Warning! Don t take it on an empty stomach and only one tiny drop at a time or the experience might burst your shriveled up little heart. Got it? "Got it."  
"Good. Go," he said, and watched the man run off to feed his addiction. Hatter took a small whiff of his hand. "He really smells."  
"Oysters were drained?" Asked Alice. "What do you mean drained?"  
He didn't want to explain all the gory details yet, so rude as it may be, he changed the subject. "Ratty tells me you're looking for someone." Hatter moved, and sat back down to his tea. At this rate, he'd never finish it.  
"His name is Jack Chase. He was taken by a man with a white rabbit on his lapel."  
He sipped his tea and stopped. "I see." He took another sip. "The white rabbit is an organization controlled by the suits. They travel back and forth, through the looking glass and vanish people from your world to ours. "Why?"  
To use. In the casino. He answered simply.  
"Use?" Alice inquired.  
Did I say use ? I-slip of the tongue, they re fine. You know, they keep em alive and " he pause, searching for the right phrase. "Moderately happy. How do I get to this casino? That s the thing! You don t. Way too dangerous. But I know some people," he said, approaching her slowly. "who know some well other people, if you know what I mean." He was almost in her face. He could smell her. She smelled like lavendar. "It s one of the privileges of running a tea shop. He finished, popping the 'p' in her face. He grinned, amused with himself, but realized that amusement wasn't mutual. "Lighten up. He said, and got an idea. With a few quick strides, he was at a glass wardrobe, packed full of clothes and shoes. "Tada!" he said, opening the doors. She had to be cold. "You," he said, grabbing a jacet he didn't much care for, "Should wear this." He strode back to her. It ll cover the glow and stop you from catching a cold. Yes. It would be a shame if she caught a cold, he thought. I have a little money. But I understand you don t use that here. Pieces of paper? Pointless. But he saw the ring. This guy she was looking for must be special, if he gave her that ring. It was quite a rock.  
Then why would you help me? Before he could stop himself, he was by her again, checking her out. Again, he took in long brown hair, wet dress, and tights.  
"Do I need a reason to help a pretty girl in a very wet dress? She spun around and looked at him.  
"Oh. I see. You don't trust me. fine," he said, and threw the jacket on an armchair. "I am genuinely hurt. You know why they call me Hatter? Because you wear a hat? "No " Yes, he thought. That was obviously why, but he wanted her to think he was actually going to help her. Not pawn her off on the resistance, and get a fair amount of goods for it. That rock would DEFINETLY be useful.  
Because I m always there when they pass the hat, so to speak. Philanthropy, generosity, I mean you can call it what you will it s who I am! And right now, looking at you there, there s nothing I want more than to help you find He could care less what his name was.  
"Jack," she offered up anyways.  
Jack! And return you back to your charming world of children s stories. "I don't believe you," she said. Hatter was figuring out quick that Alice was not like most oysters,who trust too easily.  
I know what you re thinking. If I m the frying pan than that out there, He pointed outside. Is the fire. I ll be square with you. I know people who like to help your kind. And if every once in awhile I scratch their back He trailed off to let her finish the well known phrase. She did not dissapoint.  
They ll scratch yours. Precisely. Lotta scratching! Alice turned to the coat on, and Hatter let a little victory smile surface. He walked to a door to the left and opened it.  
"Do try to keep up." 


End file.
